Why we shouldn’t get our relationship advice online

Editor’s Note: The author, Amanda Miller, is a student in the fall 2010 Women’s Studies Program Special Topics course, That Chick is Crazy: Women and Madness, at The University of Akron.

Recently there was an article written by Madeline Murphy that let the cat out of the bag about all women. It exposed the biggest lies she said “all” women tell. 

These “essential five lies ALL women tell” are a valuable asset to men, according to Murphy, because now that men have learned about the manipulative lies their women are telling, women will become more “straightforward.”

You must be wondering what these five infamous lies ALL women tell could be. Well, if you’re a women you probably already know them quite well, but in a nutshell the first trick in our liar handbook is the lie, “I’m not mad at you.” All women, of course, use this lie to avoid confrontation and defend emotions because, as Murphy states, all women dwell on their thoughts, and get overly mad about the slightest things.

The second lie used was, “I don’t mind if you go to the strip clubs with the boys,” which of course is a dead giveaway because all women are mad, crazy, jealous beings whose self-worth is measured by the insecure neediness satisfied by our boyfriends.

Next is the little white lie to “soften the rejection” of a man and make ourselves look empathetic and independent which is, “I’m just not ready for a boyfriend right now.”  Because of course we couldn’t actually NOT be interested in a relationship, or be allowed to cherish freedom and independence from men.  Why can’t women value being single as much as men do?

 The next lie, “I don’t mind picking up the tab tonight; you always pay anyway,” is a straight up lie because women “always expect men to pay.” 

The last faulty lie was “that was f*cking great!”  Which of course we would lie about because it would just hurt the man’s ego if we said how we really felt, not to mention women are not supposed to get enjoyment out of sex anyway.

I don’t know about you, but to me all of this seems quite biased; women can’t be the only liars in a relationships. This got me thinking, what about all the lies men lead women to believe?  Shouldn’t we be wary of our male partners lying habits just as much? 

After much inquiry, I came up with my own list of the top five lies ALL men tell to women, along with some ways women can detect these lies, and what they should do when their man tries to pull one of these over. 

The first lie is, “I don’t check out other women.”  Women, this is a lie ALL men tell. Of course he is checking out other women! 

Lie number two is used even more often especially when they know their in-trouble which is, “You look beautiful.”  Note to all women, if your man calls you beautiful, he is lying; he is just trying to get some later.

The third lie ALL men tell is, “I Love You, Baby.” You know he is lying when first of all he just met you, and second he isn’t even over his last girlfriend yet, which includes the two sub-lies, “I‘m over her or I‘m single.” Yet again, beware, he is just trying to get some once again with this line.

The fourth lie is, “I’m adventurous.”  This is a lie because if you call playing video games, sitting on the couch watching ESPN, and occasionally taking us out for fast food “adventurous,” then we have problems.

Finally, the last lie ALL men tell is a tie between, “I’ll take care of that next week” and “Yes, I’m listening.”  These of course speak for themselves, but we won’t hold our breath waiting for some chores to be done around the house or for them to remember something.

Of course how valid could these lies really be for both men and women to ALL use?  Obviously this is doing nothing for relationships but making people more hesitant about trusting and ultimately crazy because our guards have to constantly be up.

Relationship advice 101: Don’t get your relationship/dating advice from an article or any other less credible source!  It is simply too easy to go about making generalizations about the other sex, and I hope you can now see how anyone could come up with information such as this to stereotype the other sex, something which Murphy has mastered.    



One Response

  1. Hahahaaaa this was funny.

    I think these white lies are necessary though. A relationship can’t function on brute honesty… at least with all the women i have dated I have had to tone it down…

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