Last Saturday I went to the main library for a gardening program. Of the various sessions my favorite was on how to use worms to compost your garbage. It sounded like such a great idea. If you recycle your plastic and compost your paper and food scraps, you can have a very small impact on mother earth.
So I went on line and found where to buy worms. Not earthworms, but these little red ones that apparently enjoy eating paper and scraps. The poo- called castings is apparently better than any fertilizer so you are doing several good things at once.
I ordered my worms and eagerly awaited there arrival. When I got home from work Thursday the little white box was on my front porch with the words LIVE ITEMS INSIDE.
I immediately went to K-Mart and bought the 18 gallon plastic bin that I thought would become my worms’ new home. Reading the instructions from the meeting at the library and probably 100 Web sites about worms, I prepared the bin. The instructions say to place wet torn paper, newspapers, dirt, etc. in the bin with a small amount of garbage for the worms to eat. Within a few months your garbage bin should turn into beautiful black gold for your garden.
I followed the directions and then lovingly placed my little red worms in the bin and went to bed. When I got up this morning I went right away to check out my new pets. I didn’t have to go far. Many of the 250 worms I had purchased had decided to leave the bin and walk all over my kitchen floor and living room carpet. Several were still alive but others were dried up like some crazed child had put them under a magnifying glass.
I scooped up the survivors and placed them back in the bin. I went again to the Web and looked up why would worms leave the bin.
Oh, my God. The question was specifically answered on several sites. Your worms crawl out of the bin when they are unhappy.
Why are my worms unhappy? They just moved in with me. I’ve had a couple husbands, and to be honest, neither one lasted very long, but I didn’t think the worms would be in such a hurry to get the hell out of there.
I guess I’ll try my worm colony a couple of more days. But maybe I’m just not made to be green. Maybe my garbage should go in indestructable garbage bags into sealed landfills and never again see the light of day.
Like so many of my little life projects, it sounded like such a good idea at the time.